2014: The year of so many opportunities that I can't remember them all

It's been quite a year. I've done enough in 2014 to cover about 5 years... it was busy, wonderful, hard, overwhelming, challenging, and rewarding all at the same time.

2014 began a year ago with... me sleeping in my bed because I had a terrible headache and went to bed at 9 instead of staying up until midnight. It was peaceful.

And then, less peacefully, came the 2nd semester of my junior year of high school... which meant a lot of school work, plus raveling to debate tournaments in Kansas, Bellevue, Minnesota, and Iowa. I got 3rd in impromptu at one tournament by talking about the failures of my past love life, and Natalie and I finally broke our 2nd place streak by getting first place in Team Policy debate at Regionals. Those were some fun times. I also spent the first three months of the year attending regular meetings every week to prepare for a mission's trip.

In April, I took the ACT for the last time, and then went on a mission's trip to Mexico (my first time out of the United States!) and got to spend a week sharing God's Word and His love with kids who were eager to learn. My heart was filled with so much joy. 

In May, there was Regionals, home school graduation (where I thought: "That'll be me next year!"), and a ton of graduation parties to attend.

In June, I spent the first week living on the UNL campus because I was attending Nebraska Girls State. I made new friends, ran for a political office, and was elected chairman of the Nationalist party, so I got to be in charge of managing the thoughts and opinions of 200 girls. As soon as that week was over, my parents picked me up, I went home, packed a different suitcase, and we drove (along with Haley and Annie) all the way out to Virginia. We all read "the Fault in Our Stars" on the way out, and decided it was OK, but not great. That week we attended the NCFCA National tournament at Patrick Henry College. I was tired of people (which never happens), sick with a really bad cough (always perfect when you have to do a lot of speaking), but it was a fun week. Then we took another couple of days, after the tournament was over, to go into Washington D.C. and do some touring there, which was fun... and then we also made a stop at Colonial Williamsburg. Then we started traveling back and made a stop at Hillsdale, Michigan for a college visit, before finally making it home. You know, I love traveling and seeing new places, but getting home after that trip was one of the best feelings in the world. I believe in my heart that Nebraska really is the Good Life.

In July, I flew back out to Washington D.C. for Girls Nation, where I spent a week with nearly a hundred girls from all around the United States. We debated bills that we had written in a mock Senate, we visited monuments and memorials, had a wreath-laying ceremony at Arlington Cemetery, visited the Holocaust museum and heard the story of a Holocaust survivor, we met with our Senators and Representatives, visited the Library of Congress, held an inauguration ceremony in the Capitol, and met the President of the United States. I made a lot of friends that week, but that week also taught me to be very grateful for the moral values and upbringing that I have been given.

In August, I said goodbye to all my friends who were heading to college, and then my family traveled to Colorado for some intense hiking experiences. We attempted to climb Long's Peak, and even though we didn't make it (at 6.5 miles up the mountain, there was a bad storm, so we decided to be smart and not continue), I still had a great experience. Climbing up above the treeline at 3 or 4 in the morning is an incredible experience... to the East we could see the entire city of Denver and the lights that illuminated it. Above me, the stars shined more brightly than they ever had before (probably because I was so high up). And then we got to watch the sunrise.... and watch as the sun's light slowly warmed and brought light to the world around me. It was magnificent. At the end of August, I also started dating my best friend Jonah, and the conversations with him and memories that we've made have been wonderful.

September began with the realization that everyone who had ever told me that "Senior year is so easy!" was actually lying. My life was quickly consumed with scholarship applications, a college application (ok, so I only applied to one place...), trying to make decisions for next year, and keeping up with homework. It was a good kind of busy.

October wasn't too exciting... just a lot of meetings to go to, campaigning to do, events at UNL to attend, homework to do, and a Physics class at a local college that stressed me out more than I should have let it. 

In November, I had the opportunity to speak in front of some veterans and show them my appreciation for everything that they've done for this country. I turned 18, registered to vote, and didn't buy any cigarettes. 

In December, I finished school for the semester (I'm 7/8 of the way through high school!!!), pulled off a high A in my Physics class, got 3rd at a practice debate tournament, and spent Christmas Eve, Christmas Day, and several days after Christmas with family... just talking, telling stories, and learning how to dance better. And then somehow on the 31st of December I found myself sitting here, writing about what a year it has been.

I feel so blessed to have been given so many chances to have such wonderful experiences this past year. It's been incredible.... but not just because I've done cool things. It's been incredible because this year I met new people, made new friendships, strengthened old friendships, and had better conversations and laughed more than I have in any of the other years. Doing things and going to interesting places have given me a lot of good memories. But the best memories from this year have just been from people. Late night hotel conversations with Annie and Haley, going for a walk in the evening at the Minnesota National Open, meeting Israelis who were on vacation in Colorado and getting to know them, telling family stories around the fire on December 26th, talking about my faith and having it challenged, spending evenings playing games and watching movies with people that I love... those times have given me the best memories of this past year. 

Thank you so much, everyone. You all have helped to make 2014 the best year yet. :) Now let's make 2015 even better.... ;)

"Your personal beliefs offend me"

There's one thing I've noticed about Americans lately: we are people who get really offended. About everything. Everything. We're offended when people say something that we don't agree with, but not only that, some people are offended when other people don't BELIEVE the same things that they do.  

 

What. on. earth.

 

Is that what our world has become? 

 

Oh my gosh, people. Seriously can everyone just CHILL OUT for one week or something?

 

Offended, according to google, means: "resentful or annoyed, typically as a result of a perceived insult." 

 

That's pretty accurate, if you ask me. People act like another person believing something that they don't agree with is a personal insult, which means that we have a right to be super resentful/annoyed about it.

 

 Guys, come on. Nothing good comes out of someone acting offended by a statement/belief. Just because someone says something that you don't agree with or something that may not be the nicest thing DOES NOT mean you have to be offended.

 

Gay people get offended when people don't agree with their beliefs, different races get offended when things aren't perfectly equal. Women get offended that things aren't perfectly equal for them. But is being offended really the right response? I'm not so sure it is. 

 

I don't think Jesus was ever "offended" by what people/said did. Did he agree with everything other people said/did? Obviously not. He wasn't offended when people mocked him or blatantly disagreed with his teachings. He did rebuke people, and sometimes it was harsh. But he didn't do it because he was offended. Being offended isn't a good reason to do anything. Doing something out of love, or doing something because you know it is what is right/for the best, that's different. But please, please, don't make decisions or act on something just because you were offended. 

 

Martin Luther King Jr. didn't help lead the civil rights movement because he was offended by how the blacks were being treated. He saw discrimination as WRONG, so he did what he believed was RIGHT, but he didn't do it because he felt like people were personally insulting him and he was resentful. It's all about your motives.

 

It seems to me that the people in history who truly wanted to make a difference... they weren't the people standing from soap boxes shouting things about how things are so unfair for them and yelling about how they are soooo upset that you don't agree with them. 

 

No, that's not how it goes.

 

The people who truly make a difference realize that there is some injustice going on, or something is truly wrong, and they want to fix it. But they aren't fixing it just because they're resentful towards other people, they fix problems because they want to make the world a better place and they are motivated by what they believe is RIGHT, not by what they were offended by. 

 

So, guess what, everyone? You don't have to be offended by everything. Please don't be. It makes for a lot of grumpy people who hate each other and just want to get back at other people and show that "I'm better than they are!" 

 

Let's learn to be a society that can respectfully disagree with others, and at the same time work to make necessary changes in a thoughtful and kind way on issues that we believe are right/wrong.

"...And I was alone."

The other day I was looking through some things that I wrote a couple years ago, and I came across this. I kinda liked it:

"I always have this fear that one day you are going to discover that I'm not as great as you once thought I was. <--this is to be alone.

Once upon a time, I surrounded myself with a wall. Not just any wall… not just wall of sticks or stones. I surrounded myself with a fortress. A mental fortress. Impossible for even the strongest to penetrate. I was determined, so very determined, that I would be the only one allowed inside my fortress. I did not want to be close to other people. Confined within the walls that I had so carefully constructed, I was able to create my own world. I had my own dreams and lived my own destiny. I did not want others to truly know me. Within me resided the fear that one day I would be discovered. But no! I would not let that happen. The truth is; I was afraid. Afraid to let people befriend me, afraid to let them discover who I truly was. I was not perfect. In fact, I was far from it. I raised the expectations for myself to a height where I almost expected myself to achieve perfection – but I was never able to do so. I felt that those around me wanted me to be so perfect that they expected more of me than I was able to give. It was a panicked feeling, the feeling that I was not good enough, that I could never be good enough. I gave myself the appearance of someone who was to be desired, loved. I was, I suppose you could say, popular, adored. But that wasn’t the real me, that was a disguise that I had thrown on top of my real identity because I didn’t want people to know that I wasn’t really as great as they thought I was. But living a lie, while the lie may have looked good, made me an outcast on the inside. I had forbidden myself to grow close to anyone, because I knew that that would mean uncovering who I truly was. I had no one to talk to about my deepest troubles, no one to confide in. I knew that I was a broken person – but I didn’t want others to know. But then, slowly, I began to realize, that to live with the fearful mindset of wanting to be great only because I wanted to keep people from discovering the true me – that mindset is loneliness, solitude. And I was alone. I realized that I’d rather have people see the true, plain, not-all-that-interesting me, rather than be alone. So I tore down the wall. Bit by bit, it all came crashing down around me. If I had previously stood a princess, now I stood a pauper. My life changed drastically. Many rejected me. I had expected this; people did indeed realize that I was not as great as I had once claimed to be. But then there were others who stuck by me. People who truly did understand, people who didn’t care who I was or that I was so imperfect. Those were the people who were real. They were real enough to realize that not everyone is perfect, that everyone makes mistakes. They understood that people hurt, that everyone falls down. And those friends are the people who, when I did fall down, were able to pick me up again."

rainy day thoughts

Some days are sunny and life is easy and everyone is happy and you wonder if things could ever go wrong. But some days are also cloudy and you think it might rain and you spend the day at home listening to sad music and thinking over every hard thing in life, and it seems impossible to imagine ever being truly happy and content with your life. There will be times when I stay up late trying to solve all the world's problems. There will be days when I forget to smile. 

But that's okay, because even though I'm imperfect, I still want to love you. You will have hard days, and I will too... some days I will cry and you won't be around to comfort me. But I want to love you through the hard days and through the wonderful days. I want to be by your side when you need me, and I want to be by your side on the sunny days when the happiest memories are made. You are like sunshine on the darkest days, you make me smile at my weakest moments. When I'm with you, the stars seem to shine brighter, my heart is warmer, and you make me want to be content with where I am, but still live life to the fullest.

[a post on thankfulness]

I think I've posted about thankfulness before... yeah, pretty sure I have. But that's okay, because it's one of those topics that doesn't get old quickly. 

Anyways, I was nominated to do the 5-day gratitude challenge, or whatever the official title of it is called, but instead of doing the challenge over 5 days (I did day #1 yesterday already), I decided to just combine the last four days into a blog post... because I want to write about thankfulness, and that way y'all don't have to see stuff from me every single day. This is just easier. :)

Now, you can be thankful for the little things in life and you can be thankful for the big things in life. I personally think it's important to appreciate BOTH - the little things can bring us so much joy, the big things are great too. We never know when something may be lost and we won't have the chance to be thankful for it any more.

I think that being thankful is a mindset. It's a mindset of not taking things for granted, appreciating what things you do have even on hard days, and taking the time to enjoy those little moments in life that we never want to forget. (p.s. this mindset lasts for longer than a 5 day challenge).

Guys, we live in the UNITED STATES OF AMERICA - do you know what that means? It means we're some of the most blessed people in the whole. wide. world. And you know what? I think that despite that, we still complain more than any other country in the world (I could be wrong, but that's what it seems like). Don't get me wrong, I complain too... sometimes a lot, but that is not something that I want to be known for or something that I am proud of. 

When I take a step back and look at the big picture, there is no reason for Americans to be so ungrateful about everything. C'MON EVERYONE-- when I look at the news going on around the world, I can't help but be amazed at how blessed I am. I can worship God freely, I can proclaim my agreement or disagreement with politicians, I don't have to worry about leaving my house and getting blown up, any citizen 18 & up can vote (regardless of race or gender), we all have food on our tables, we have soldiers who fight to protect us and our rights, most of us have parents who care about us, people have the ability to choose to educate their kids how they want... ALL OF THESE THINGS (the list goes on and on)... and yet, people still complain or point out how they don't have the newest phone model, so their life is just really terrible, or they're just soooo tired of going to school and they wish they could stay home all day. That is lame. We take so many things for GRANTED here, things that other people in other countries would be so grateful to have (like education, food, a family, protection, a government that isn't openly terribly corrupt and goes about killing all its citizens, etc. (guys I know our government isn't the best... but it's still way better than governments in other countries)).

We are so focused on getting MORE that we forget what we already HAVE. We somehow look past all of the things that we have been blessed with and instead all we want are things that we don't have, and we think "oh, well if I had that, then I wouldn't want anything else because that thing would make me happy". In the words of one of Jake Owen's songs... "We all want what we ain't got".

Things are SO flipped around in the world. We have everything but complain as if we have nothing, and people in other countries have nothing and still are so thankful for even the littlest things in life. That doesn't make sense.

Closing thoughts: Be thankful for what you have, because... someday you may not have that stuff any more. Be grateful for the friends that you have now and your loving family. Right now have the ability to speak up about your beliefs and to talk to people in power about why you think they should change their ideas or what you like about what they're doing - not everyone has that in other countries. Take full advantage of your education, because even though a lot of people in my generation don't enjoy it or care about their education, we are so blessed to even be able to take the classes that we do and go to colleges and universities and gain knowledge. 

YOU have been incredibly blessed where you are right now, understand that. Now go forth and be thankful in your life for the little things and the big things, and if somehow you lose everything in life, still be thankful that you serve a great God who has given you life on this earth. Finally, make being thankful a mindset, not just something that you do occasionally or for a 5 day challenge. 

1 Thessalonians 5:18 "... give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you."

I believe in equal opportunity, but I'm not a feminist

Feminism seems to be a popular topic these days. I have friends that are feminists, and I have friends that aren't feminists... and I respect them all. I believe that men and women should all have equal opportunities in the world, and if a woman wants to go out in the world and accomplish great things, she should totally go for it. But when people ask me if I am a feminist, the answer is no, for a few reasons. 

A lot of people tell me, "Oh, you should be a feminist. Some feminists have liberal ideas, but not everyone is like that." Of course not everyone is like that, but in my experience, and from speaking to several feminists that I know, it seems that actually... most of the feminist movement is like that. In fact, I would say that about 95% of the feminists that I know do support the liberal principles that the feminist movement as a whole has set forth (things like women should be allowed to control their bodies, which means that abortion is okay). I find it very hard to sympathize or side with a group of people that, for the most part (in my experience), are advocates for many ideas that I disagree with. 

First off, maybe this one isn’t as important, but it’s important to me. Let’s just take a look at the word “feminist”. Nothing about that word, in and of itself, speaks “equality” to me. All other words similar to this word value one thing/person above another. For example, a sexist is someone who values one sex above another. A racist is someone who values one race above another. A socialist or capitalist is someone who values a certain kind of government or economic system above another kind. This leads me to believe that the word "feminist" really doesn't have anything to do with equality, it honestly just sounds like a word that means that some people value women above other people. Sorry, just what it sounds like. It's not a word that tells me anything about the feminist movement being all about equality.

Secondly, the feminist movement claims that their main goal is equality, but equality isn't something that you can force. For example, there is an unequal number of men and women in Congress, and I really don’t have a problem with that. There could be so many outside reasons for that, and I don’t think we should ever reach the point where feminists are so passionate about things being equal, that they insist that an equal number of men and women work in Congress. I think everyone should have equal opportunity (the idea that everyone should have the same chance to do something), but you should never force there to be equality simply by comparing statistics of the number of men to women in certain things.

I also don't like or appreciate how the feminists focus so much on how unjust things are for women, how unequal things are, etc. The problem is that they fail to acknowledge how many rights and freedoms women have in the United States compared to other countries.  Compared to women in a lot of other countries around the world, we are doing SO WELL. We are actually treated as human beings. Personally, I’d rather focus my time and energy into helping other women around the globe get the point where we are now, I'd rather help those women be treated like human beings, instead of worrying about the fact that right now, there are more men than women in Congress, and women make a little bit less than men. It’s really not that big of a deal, compared to problems that other women face around the globe. I am so thankful for the freedoms and rights that we as women, DO have today.  

The whole idea of feminism, from what I’ve seen and read, is focused on the idea that women don’t want to just stay at home, they want to get out there and do things, they want to run for political office, they want to be CEO’s, etc. Now there’s nothing wrong with having big goals, but I do have a problem with the idea that staying at home and working is somehow “not good enough”. My mom used to teach at a university, but she gave that career up so that she could raise her kids (one of which is me) at home. I have NEVER seen her as being “lesser” than other women, or her job somehow being “unequal”, simply because she chose to stay home instead of going out and teaching or doing something that is supposedly greater. In fact, I would argue that all jobs are equally important, all are necessary, including the job of just being a mom. Moms raise the children up to be good citizens of the country, they have the ability to teach them life lessons, good morals, etc. That is a noble job. I know that I have the ability to someday do something like run for a political office, but I’m not entirely sure that that’s what I want to do with my life. I’m actually strongly considering raising a family, as a job. I wouldn’t get paid for that, but by no means would I think that I am somehow on an unequal level for men. I would be more than happy to spend a part of my life raising children, and then maybe later in my life I could do something in politics (like when my children get older, be a lobbyist or something). Again, don’t get me wrong, if you want to go to law school or run for president or whatever, GO FOR IT. That’s awesome that you want to do that. But I don’t like the way the feminist movement seems to think that men somehow get more important jobs than women, when in fact, I believe women have been given the wonderful opportunity to raise up the next generation. We don’t all have to do the same thing, we’re all different, and that’s okay. I’ve come to accept that guys are probably just better at some things than girls are (like guys are generally better at carrying heavy stones and building big buildings than girls are), and then girls are better at some things than boys are. That’s just how we are. AND THAT’S OKAY. Women should never feel obligated to do something that a man is doing, just to feel equal. 

I realize that what I said is a generalization of the feminist movement, but that is how I see the movement as a whole, and it's why I won't call myself a feminist. As I said, I believe in equal opportunity for men AND women, but the feminist movement promotes so much more than that, and I can't bring myself to support them. 

Feminism

Spending an entire week in Washington DC with 97 other girls from all over the United States was quite the experience. I really enjoyed the company of some of the girls, but one thing I did learn while I was there was that… basically everyone was a feminist, and if you weren’t a feminist, then you were super weird…. Which means that I’m super weird.

Here’s what I heard all week long:

“I am SO ready for Hillary Clinton to be president. It’s about time we had a woman president.”

“Women are the only ones whose healthcare decisions are being made by men in the work place”

(asked to me): “Doesn’t being a Republican women make you feel oppressed by all the men?”

“I’m so happy to be in a room of feminists!"

(my personal favorite): “Women will and should rule the world someday” 

(When we met up with Boys Nation):

A White House reporter, who was a woman, decided to let us ask her some questions. She answered a boy’s question first, which several of the girls got upset about…“I can’t believe the boys were allowed to go first, we should have been allowed to go first.”

When President Obama was shaking hands with some of the Boys and Girls Nation senators: “He shook more boys’ hands than girls’ hands!”

The general stance on men: They’re all mostly misogynists.The funny thing about this is that if you ask them about it, they will deny that they "hate men"... and maybe they don't actually hate them, but seriously, that's how they act quite a bit of the time. 

^That went on the whole week. Yeah. Now maybe it’s just the fact that I’m a homeschooled-republican-Christian from Nebraska, but never have I heard so many extreme feminist statements in one place in one week. To my knowledge, it was only myself and the other Senator from Nebraska who did not identify ourselves as feminists.

Don’t get me wrong – I do firmly believe that yes, women should be respected, and that yes, women should be treated equally. But I also understand that men and women can both play different roles in society, and that’s okay. WE DON’T ALL HAVE TO BE THE SAME. Women don’t have to serve in men’s roles. And I don’t think that just because a woman is capable of something that she should do it or that she needs to feel obligated to do it.

The main problem that I see with the feminist movement today is that women are demanding to be respected and elevated to the highest of positions, just to prove that they are as capable as men. Annnnnd… that seems like a really dumb reason (that we’re only doing it to “prove” something to other people). In addition to demanding this respect, a lot of times the feminists show little or no respect for men, because they blame them for all the “problems”. Men, on the other hand, try to show respect to women, but I feel like a lot of times women reject it. Men try to do nice things for women… like opening doors, giving compliments, etc. and they always take it wrongly (like with the opening a door thing… women seem to think that because a guy is doing that, he doesn’t think she’s capable of doing it on her own… seriously? Maybe the guy was just trying to be nice and respectful. None of the guys I know offer to open doors for girls because they think girls are incapable).

Personally, I’d rather spend my time and effort into fixing problems in places of the world where women really ARE suffering – like, you know, the Middle East, or India, or some place like that… where women are actually commonly treated as animals, where abuse is not uncommon (and isn’t punishable), etc. It seems to me (and maybe it’s just me…??) that spending time helping those women gain self-respect, help society to view as human beings, and help them gain rights, is a much more worthy cause than me marching around saying that the world is an unfair and unjust place, because in America, we don’t yet have a woman president and women sometimes get paid a few cents less per hour than men do.

We really don’t have it as bad as some people say we do. And, let’s be honest, in just 100 years, we’ve come a LONG way… we have the right to vote, we can run for offices, we have women governors, women representatives and senators, and women are serving in job positions that men used to hold exclusively. 

Don't get me wrong here, everyone. If you have great big aspirations and dreams, and you want to run for a big political office or whatever - go for it. That's totally cool, and I admire you for doing that. But I won't vote for you just because you're a woman - if you have good ideas on the other hand, that's a reason for me to vote for you.  

Basically I think that: 1) It’s not as big of a problem as everyone thinks it is, and it’s waaaay worse in other places. 2) If you want to focus on this problem, then be kinder about it, and please, please, don’t come across as someone who hates men and thinks women are far superior. 3) If you're good at something, by all means try to get a high position in a company or whatever... good for you if you can do that. But don't demand that you receive the position just because you're a woman.

The End 

P.S. Yes, I know this post was a generalization. I know that not every feminist/woman is like this, but that's the general feeling I got from this past week. :P

After a While

"After a while you learn the subtle difference between holding a hand and chaining a soul and you learn love doesn't mean leaning and company doesn't always mean security.
 
And you begin to learn that kisses aren't contracts and presents aren't always promises and you begin to accept your defeats with your head up and and your eyes ahead with the grace of a woman, not the grief of a child.
 
And you learn to build all your roads on today because tomorrow's ground is too uncertain for plans and futures have a way of falling down in mid-flight.
 
After a while you learn that even sunshine burns if you get too much
 
So you plant your own garden and decorate your own soul instead of waiting for someone to bring you flowers
 
And you learn that you really can endure, that you really are strong and you really do have worth and you learn and you learn...
 
...with every good-bye you learn."


-Veronica A. Shoffstall 

= this is a rant =

As the title already warned you, this is a rant. If you don't like those, you don't have to read it. Bye. 

Now that the only people left are people who like to read rants... let's get started. This is something that's been on my mind the past couple months. It's not my goal to be super critical or preachy, and if it comes across like that... sorry. But this is how I feel.

I remember back in the day when if I heard a bad word, it was either in a movie I was watching or from some person who didn't know any better. More recently however, I've started hearing people cuss more and more... and it's not because I am suddenly hanging out with a bad crowd. I'm hearing a lot of bad language coming from homeschoolers. Christian homeschoolers. That's not cool.

Before I keep going, I want to point out two things: 

1) I understand that there are certain situations where swearing or whatever may be appropriate. For example: if something really terrible happens to you or if you're a soldier in war or something. But if someone is being a bad driver, or if your day isn't going 100% how you planned, that is not an acceptable reason to start throwing out f-bombs. 

2) Don't get me wrong here... I'm not saying that if you swear regularly I think you're a terrible person and I won't ever talk to you again. That's not what I think. And also understand that I also don't always have the best choice of vocabulary, but I use bad words rarely and if I do use them, it's in private... like, to myself. Not to other people. 

Ok, now let's keep going. 

From my experience, and what I've seen in the past couple years, or even in the past months, it seems that most people take on the mindset of "if you swear, you're mature and cool". Let me get something straight here... swearing = immature. When I hear people cuss other people out, what DOESN'T pop into my mind is "oh wow, they're so mature and cool". Honestly, the first thing that comes to mind is, "Wow, they don't have enough class to know what's appropriate to say".

That leads me to my second point... swearing is not classy or respectable. It's just not. Get that in your head and let it stay there forever. If you want to have the respect of people, then it's not necessary to start swearing for no good reason at all. 

It seems to me that another reason for people choosing to swear is because their parents don't want it and kids these days just like to be rebellious. Several times now, I've heard someone say a bad word, quickly followed up by "oh, don't tell my parents I said that." This is never said in a sorry way, like "oh no, I shouldn't have said that...", it's always more of a "I don't care about what I just said, just don't let my parents know." Whatever happened to having a bit of respect for what parents wanted?

One of the times when swearing disappoints me the most is in speech & debate. Now you would think that Christian homeschoolers who are in a Christian homeschooled league with a focus on communicating in a way that glorifies God would have learned by now how to communicate in such a way so as to get their point across in a loving manner. But apparently not. Now I know that debate rounds can be frustrating... I've been annoyed multiple times, but several times this year, I've had different people come up to me after their round and say something along the lines of, "Wow, that round was so bad... I just wanted to kill the other team. I got so mad during their last speech that I had to write f-bombs all over my flow pad." Um... really? You had to do that? I'm not impressed. At all. In fact, I find it embarrassing that that is what happens in a Christian, homeschooled debate league. That is not an acceptable reason to swear, no matter what you think, so get your act together. That seems to defeat the whole purpose of being in a speech & debate league, if the only thing you can think to do when you don't agree with someone is start cussing them out. Yeah, people make us mad... that's still not a reason to cuss them out, sorry. It's only a debate round, people.

Outside of speech & debate, I've heard this example a couple times too, "So I was with my friend, and we were walking, but there was this bad driver... so we gave him the middle finger and cussed him out." C'mon guys... really? I'm sure what the driver thought was "Wow, what nice Christian kids".... not. What if the driver was just having a really bad day? I'm sure you didn't make it any better. Maybe I'm the only one who does this... yeah, I probably am... but I always make it a point to smile at drivers like that... yes, they annoy me too sometimes, but who knows? Maybe they just need someone to be a little encouraging.

And finally...

>>>>if you read nothing else in this post, read this part<<<<

I'm pretty sure that God doesn't look down on his people when they throw out f-bombs and say, "Wow, them saying that is so honoring to me." Nooope. I'm pretty sure that God did not give you a mouth just so that you could cuss other people out. 

I'm just gonna throw a couple verses out here:

Ephesians 4:29, "Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear."  

Proverbs 15:2,4 "The tongue of the wise commends knowledge, but the mouths of fools pour out folly... A gentle tongue is a tree of life, but perverseness in it breaks the spirit."

Ephesians 5:4, "Let there be no filthiness nor foolish talk nor crude joking, which are out of place, but instead let there be thanksgiving." 

I think you get the point. (btw, if you want more verses.... I have more, haha).   

Anyways. Guys... when you swear for no good reason, that is not honoring to God. As I mentioned before, there may be some instances where swearing is acceptable.... like if you're a soldier in a battle. That's different because the soldier is fighting against extreme evil. But we're not soldiers, we're all homeschooled Christian high school students, and the other debate team in a debate round is not an extreme evil, no matter what you may think. The driver on the street is not extremely evil. You don't have a good reason to cuss them out, you just don't.   

And now I'm going to pull out a C.S. Lewis quote... "Don't shine so that others can see you. Shine so that through you, others can see Him." Let me just say... especially when you swear in public, or around other people... people will not see God in you. I think that the words that we choose to say and write should be chosen in such a way so that other people can see God in us, and God is honored, especially if we're wanting and trying to live our lives as Christians. If we want other people to see God in us, then choosing the right words to say is important. Just a thought.   

Ok, I'm done now. Rant = over. Again, I love you all to pieces, and I promise I don't hate any of you... and maybe I'm making too big of a deal out of this, it's just something that kinda bothers me. :)

The End.

5.17.2014

I think sometimes that when God closes doors, He doesn't want us to just stand there and wait for a new one to be opened... I think sometimes God wants us to kick that door down to show Him how much we actually care about and want what is on the other side.

llévame de vuelta // take me back

All I can think about since getting back from Mexico is... Mexico.  In my head I am always seeing those precious little faces smiling up at me, and those kids speaking rapid Spanish to me, and then their eyes lighting up when I understand them. I miss playing with my friend Cesia in the hot Mexican dirt (we were pretending to cook things). I miss blowing bubbles with Jessica and Brenda. I miss Briyan's sassy attitude coupled with his sincerity. I miss Erika's hugs and hearing her say "te quiero". I miss racing while giving piggy back rides and then hearing the kids say "¡Otra vez, otra vez!" each time I set them down again. I miss the hot Mexican sun, and the wind, and the palm trees. I miss those few days when I spoke in Spanish more than I spoke in English.

I fell in love down in Mexico. I fell in love with the country itself, despite it's multitude of problems. I fell in love with the Mexican people and their beautiful selves and their passion in everything that they do. I fell in love with their language, and I fell in love with their loud church services, with all the clapping and dancing. I miss being able to buy Mexican pop whenever I wanted to (which is 1,000 times better than any pop America has to offer). I love each and every one of those little kids that I talked to and hugged. And while I was down there, I also fell in love with... love. God's love. I fell in love with His love and its ability to bring so much joy to people who have so little. It was very powerful to witness that during the week I was there... The Mexican people may not have much, but Jesus is everything to them, and they are passionate about it. I felt more alive down in Mexico than I have in a long time. The laughter and love of the kids that I worked with lit within me a fire-- a burning fire of love and thankfulness. 

America is my country, and Nebraska is my home-- it always will be. But I left a piece of my heart down in Mexicali, and it's staying there forever.